A tiny percentage of people get pityriasis rosea. An even tinier percentage get in twice. I am ‘lucky’ enough to be in the teeny tiny percentage.
One thing being part of that lucky percentage has taught me is how much my relationship with my body/ self-image has changed.
When I first got pityriasis rosea I was 18 years old and probably not the most confident person in the room. I find it hard to relate to how I saw myself then as it has changed so much but fundamentally I felt awkward and wrong. I thought I was fat even though I really was not, I thought I was too boyish and weird and one of the few things I was proud of was my skin which tended to clear and beautiful.
So when I got pityriasis rosea and suddenly had arms and body covered in red spots it made me feel awful. I felt disgusting and unclean and all kinds of things I do not feel this time around.
As per my last bout, it has led to a flare-up of my psoriasis. So my scalp hurts, and my face has psoriasis and so on. I don’t feel ugly though, or disgusting or anything bad about my body.
I wish it would go. I would like to feel recovered as it means I have still got a virus in my body, I would like the itchiness and pain to stop. But I know it is not contagious and not due to me being ‘unclean’ it just means my body had a freak out when I got a respiratory tract infection that lasted more than a month. It was probably exacerbated by not knowing where I could/would live and not having a functioning washing machine and all the other stuff that was stressing me out.
I am hopeful that now I have a home and a new routine it will start to clear up, but if it never did I would not feel like it made me look bad. I think I can work the red polka dot skin look, I’d just rather not.